Rough Weekend.

So I couldn't bring myself to go to Holly's shower, I stopped by around noon but she wasn't there, so I called her to explain the situation and couldn't even make it through the initial hello's before I started tearing up!!! Jeremy wasn't very happy that I ditched out he said "I thought you would have just sucked it up and went" well SORRY dear!!! I really didn't think he wanted me to come home and just be all emotional for the rest of the day?! Instead me and Heather went to the boutique in Lehi, Robert's Crafts, and yes IKEA! AND I only spent $26 ALL day!!! Pretty proud of myself. I bought a new purse, some dish towels, a stainless mixing bowl, and some lunch containers for Jeremy's lunch! I call it "retail therapy" and yes it really does help. I went to steal some eggs from Robyn, and ended up talking to her for about a half hour. It was REALLY nice, I finally got to actually sit down with another woman and cry without judgement, without fear, without feeling bad.....just pure relief of emotions. It is nice to get a woman's opinion about emotions and how no matter what we do, or what is said the hurt will always be there, it will never go away until I have that baby in my arms. Which is nothing but the truth, I will always have this void until my trial is over. It is how I deal with it, and not let life completely pass me by waiting for it. I know it will come, this will work-one way or the other. Only 2 more days till my consult! YAY!